Mama Miller Parenting

Passionate parenting and homemaking.

Adventures in Forgiveness and Coffee

on October 1, 2012

My sweet husband finally has a day off. The kids and I decided to let him sleep late and surprise him with breakfast. I had no desire to change out of pjs, so I threw on a hoodie and we set off for the coffee drive-thru.

I pulled around and this lady came through the wrong way and nearly hit me while getting in front of me. When I honked she raised her middle finger banner out the window and started yelling at me… with her bewildered teen daughter watching on.

I am human. I desperately wanted to respond with my own rude display, but I had two little sets of eyes and ears in the backseat.

Instead of waving my own banner of anger, I rolled down my windowed and tried to stay calm.

“Lady, you just flipped me off in front of my kids and yours. I came around the right way and honked because we nearly hit each other.”

More huffing and expletives were hurled at me. I just rolled up my window and turned up The Wiggles so my little ears wouldn’t hear. She seemed to calm down and I watched her talking to her teen daughter, sure she was talking about the “crazy lady” listening to kid music in the car behind her.

I seethed and tried to quiet my nerves. I may not have said anything mean, but I’ll admit that I thought it. I watched her get her coffee and pull away.

When I pulled up the girl working the window informed me that the lady in front of me had paid for our entire order.

I was blown away.

I explained what happened to the girl. She said, “We get some crazy people sometimes. I guess she felt bad.”

All the the anger I had felt washed away. Sometimes people are just people. No one is 100% good or 100% bad. We have the capacity for great kindness but we are sinful creatures.

I hope, most of all, that her daughter learned that it isn’t always what we do, but what we do after what we have done.

We all make mistakes, but being able to apologize makes us strong. When I loose it with my kids, I owe it to them to say I am sorry and make it right. When I sin, I have to show my children that I ask for forgiveness and try not to make the same mistake again.

They need to see our weakness as much as our strength.

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4 responses to “Adventures in Forgiveness and Coffee

  1. Great post! I’m not sure that 100% excuses her behavior but a very nice gesture it was!!

    • I just really hope she apologized to her daughter for acting that way. Our Starbucks is attached to a bank (so you can take out a loan for your coffee??) and instead of circling around the front to get in line, she had gone around the bank drive-thru side and was trying to jet in at a funky angle. So weird. I’ve never had someone flip me off and then pay for my coffee and muffin in the same few minutes.

  2. auntie k says:

    That’s very good you stayed calm as much as you wanted to say something mean, it shows a lot about a person because you thought about your actions. That was a nice gesture for her to pay for you order though, maybe she felt bad and that was her way of saying sorry. I really enjoyed this post because you related it back to your kids.

    • Thanks. For me, being a mom is inseparable from who I am as a person. All of my actions have to be filtered through what is best for my kids. I don’t always succeed… but I try. “Do as I say, not as I do” is not a real option. Kids will emulate what they see.

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